You know something, if you’re preparing to take the CELPIP exam, it’s easy to over focus on areas that you’re already comfortable with vs where you need to be working to improve. One of those ‘easy to overlook’ skill sets is writing. People usually pay more attention to speaking and listening skills, and tend to ignore writing skills.
We need to fix that and to get us moving in the right direction, I’d like to tell you a story about jujubes.
![](https://celpipsuccess.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/powerDescription-683x1024.png)
I come from a family of jujube lovers. (Not sure what a jujube is? They are the multicolored candies in the title graphic above this paragraph.) Have you ever tried them?
Truth: These candies take me to my happy place – they’re soft, chewy and delicious. I got my love for them from my Dad – he is a raving jujube lover.
One of the best jujube stories that I can remember is the time when my Dad proudly brought home a giant bag of jujubes. It was the largest bag of deliciousness that I had ever seen – because up to that point, the only jujube bags we had had were tiny small ones.
We were so excited to try them out!
We gathered around the kitchen table and watched as my Dad excitedly pulled the bag open. He lifted the bag up and took a deep smell, expecting to get a nose full of sweet goodness.
But something was wrong. Terribly wrong.
Instead of smiling, my Dad frowned.
“That doesn’t smell right.” He said. And passed the bag over to my brother and I so we could inspect it.
We stuffed our noses in, and immediately pulled them back – it smelled terrible, like something had gone bad. My brother, pardon me for saying so, blurted out: It smelled like someone farted in the bag and then sealed it in.
I remember laughing at the funny image his words created in my mind, but at the same time, I found myself totally agreeing with him.
My Father did as well. It smelled terrible.
Then we decided to taste it.
First my Dad. Then my brother. Then me.
All of us had the same experience: we popped the jujube into our mouth expecting the usual chewy sweet tastiness, but instead we were met with something bitter.
Not only did it smell like a fart….we all agreed that it tasted like one! (At least what we imagined tasting a fart would be like.)
Disappointed, my brother and I handed the bag back to my Father. My brother and I went to do something else, but my Dad did something different. He sat down at his desk, pulled out some paper, and began to write a letter of complaint to the jujube company.
(This was pre-internet. Pre e-mail.) Pen. Paper. An envelope and a stamp.
He showed us his letter before he mailed it off.
I distinctly remember him writing that he was a long term client and their number one jujube fan.
He explained that this was the largest jujube purchase he had ever made, and that he was terribly excited to try them out. But instead of the jujube company’s regular high quality sweet offerings, something terrible had happened, because when we opened the bag, we smelled something that reminded us of…well, poo. To our dismay, when we tried to eat the product, we discovered that the taste was not that far off from poo either.
He respectfully asked if they could please send a refund. He put the big bag of smelly nasty tasting jujubes in a box, and put the letter inside it, and then sent it to the jujube manufacturing company.
I remember wondering what good a letter to a big company would do, but within a few weeks, we got a huge box in the mail. It was from the jujube company, and was easily double the size of the one my Dad sent off.
My Dad opened the box, and to our amazement, we found ourselves looking at a box filled with every product that the jujube company made! Including a brand new giant bag of jujubes!
There was also a letter from the company. They thanked us for being such loyal jujube customers, and apologized for the jujubes that smelled and tasted like poo.
Amazing! And this time around, everything tasted exactly like it should have!
We were so excited about what happened.
Think about that story for a moment: Did you notice any details? Did they make the story more interesting to you?
The Boring No Detail Version of My Story
Jujubes are my favorite candies. I once ate some that smelled bad. They tasted bad too, so my Dad sent them back to the manufacturer with a letter of complaint.
The candy company gave us a box of every product they made as well as their biggest bag of jujubes.
I just told you, basically, the same story but I took away a lot of detail! How did my story feel to read?
The Power of Details
Details. They help you get your point across to your audience. They also will help you increase your score on the CELPIP exam if you use them.
Using details will also help you never run out of things to say before you finish the writing or speaking task, so it’s important for you to develop your ability to use them.
Here are some ways to unlock the power of details!
1.Don’t just state what’s wrong. Add adjectives and other sensory details to help your audience feel, see, smell, taste what you’re experiencing.
2. Don’t just say the situation you’re experiencing is disappointing, let the reader know what you were expecting, and then what you got instead.
3. Look at this image:
![](https://celpipsuccess.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/cityImage.png)
If you’re describing an image, like you’ll need to do on the CELPIP exam, don’t just say obvious things like you see a woman walking across the street.
Give the listener details! You can talk about the woman’s age: is she a teenager? Is she a young adult? Is she in her mid-forties? What about how she looks? Is she happy? Sad? Serious? Worried? What about her clothes? You should talk about colors and the kinds of clothes you see. The point: talk about the details. Bring out as many as you can to strengthen your answer.
Have a look at this picture above. What other details could you talk about?
In Summary:
Details help your writing and speaking become more interesting to the reader/listener.
Details help you express your ideas in more influential ways.
Details will help you get a higher score on the CELPIP exam – so make sure you’re using them.
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